• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5

This band has been getting a whole lot of press, and that makes enough sense, as they play exactly what the masses seem to want to hear these days: "shocking" music with fast guitars and "brutal" vocals, and lots of other "offensive" things for the soccer moms of the world to get up in arms about. What is the world coming to? Biomechanical might change their style up a little more than "safe" bands of this same style like Children of Bodom, but that just means they specialize in several different varieties of shit-flinging.

The basic formula for Biomechanical is to take (badly done) Pantera-esque groove/half-Thrash riffs and speed them up a few hundred notches, along with vocals that sound like the perfect mix between Rob Halford's high pitched wailing and Phil Anselmo's gritty shout, and a hard-edged, abrasive production that isn't easy on the ears at all. The solos are pure DragonForce-esque slabs of melodic richness that speed by you at about 300 mph, and there are some symphonic keys and vaguely Metalcore sounding harsh shouts as well, and when you get past the "OH MY FUCKING GOD THAT'S FAST AS FUCKING HELL!" novelty, you're left with a grisly, unpleasant mess of irritating, noisy crap. Seriously, these guys are obviously talented, but they can't write a song to save their lives. They literally sound like they're about to trip and fall over themselves. The music is bloated, completely overwrought and jam-packed with every idea the band could muster, slapped messily together in the same fashion that a dyslexic chimpanzee would pack a suitcase, lacking any sort of cohesive flow or sensible progression from one idea to the next. Fuck, this sucks.

The riffs here aren't even any good, either. The one thing that could've been the saving grace for Biomechanical, and they fuck that up too. Yeah, there are a lot of riffs, but they are just more of the same "half-Thrash groove" bullshit we've come to know and loathe in recent years from such wonder bands as Machine Head and Lamb of God, nothing special at all except for their sheer quantity. In fact, there are no songs here at all, just incoherent jumbles of crappy riffs and fast guitar soloing for the kiddies. Is that all it takes to please people these days?

There is no apparent rhyme or reason to Cannibalised, it being shockingly and frustratingly inept and inconsistent. This album is honestly near unlistenable, if not for the occasional moments where you get a solo that makes you sit up and smile, or a riff that you think would make you want to headbang if it was done with a better guitar tone, or a cool slower part that actually sounds very ominous and evil, and that just makes this album as a whole look even worse, because Biomechanical couldn't even manage a whole album of shitty music! The irony, it impales me with a bloodied blade. And why is shit like this always labeled "prog," anyway? Bizarre. If this is prog, though, then perhaps I just don't like prog anymore.

One more thought to leave you with, before I close the review: Biomechanical would be a Nu-Metal band if you slowed them down by about half and took away the melodic guitar solos. No sir, I'm not falling for this.

Biomechanical, you can take this album and shove it back right where it came from, because the Metal scene doesn't need it, or you, for that matter.