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When I started writing reviews I perversely looked forward to reviewing my first really bad album. I thought it would be a good opportunity to make a few jokes at the expense of the artist, you know, show off my wit and comedic talent. The reality is somewhat different, sadly, as I find that I just don’t want to have to think about anything other than warning everyone against trying this out. The album is Hateful Spell and it comes courtesy of Infiinite Hatred, a Korean one-man band fronted by Helnakstav who is also in Qrujhuk (another Korean one-man Black Metal band) who I will shortly have the displeasure of reviewing as well.

I had never encountered the Korean underground Black Metal scene until I heard this album, and let me tell you, this one-man outfit does not make me want to go back for a second look. Extremely raw Black Metal is the order of the day here, and I suppose that if this kind of thing girds your loins you may find something to enjoy, but this really is far too amateurish for my tastes. As far as the raw side of Black Metal goes, the production here isn’t too bad; you can hear all instruments, but it’s all backwards. The snare is barely audible, the guitars are very thin, absolutely swamped in reverb and mixed too low, and, in a surprising turn of events, the bass is too loud. This isn’t such a bad thing as the bass is actually interesting enough to drive the songs without making your head ache. The one saving grace of this disc is the vocals of Helnakstav as they are harsh and bleak and convincing enough as drenched in reverb as they are. Perhaps he could consider offering his services to a band with some songwriting skill. However, by the time "Unholy Eclipse" rolls around you are utterly tired of them (they seem to get worse as the album progresses) as they take on this "trying to puke but running on empty" kind of sound.

Hateful Spell opens with a fairly pointless "distorted acoustic" intro before bringing tears to your eyes with "Forest of Black Shadow" – not the good "my spirit exults in this glorious music" kind of tears mind you, but the "a small piece of me has died and I need to lie down" kind of tears. "Black Metal Warlord" opens with perhaps the most asinine riff I have ever heard, it is truly is just embarrassing. I have some experience with playing in a band and writing songs and I can tell you straight up that if had shown up to jam and presented this riff to my band mates, they would have kicked me square in the nuts and they would have been right to do so. The rest of the track does not improve. The album continues with the title track, a fairly uninspired and insipid piece of third rate Darkthrone worship that will have little effect other than to force you to question why the fuck you are not actually listening to Darkthrone instead of this exercise in self-torture. And so on.

Maybe there is an audience for this sort of stuff out there – poorly produced, amateur, underground Black Metal that borders on noise – and if so, good luck to all involved. If however you prefer some musical talent and songwriting skill in your extreme metal then I suggest that you develop some kind of mental impairment that distracts you by causing you to crave ice cream whenever you hear the words "Infinite Hatred". Sure, you might end up fatter, but you will also be happier.