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If there was any proof needed to attest to America's proclivity for bleeding a good thing dry, this would be it. After releasing their debut full-length (or so they say; I can't imagine anyone stupid enough to actually buy it), US metal wannabies Hauk are unfortunately back with us, and their new EP To Hear the Trumpets Call, isn't exactly what I expected, or probably what they intended either. In fact, they should have just called it To Try and Cash In on the Latest Flavor of the Month instead of dressing it up in all its unnecessary battle apparel.

Since bands brandishing their crystal swords and stroking their loin cloth-covered genitals are what's in at the moment, it looks like Hauk has decided to give it a go and hope for the best. Amon Amarth it sure ain't, but those conversant with the more underground form of 80s based Epic Heavy Metal such as Manila Road, Heavy Load and to a lesser extent Battleroar will have a greater point of reference here, as the deeply unnatural material making up To Hear the Trumpets Call is, in essence, Traditional Metal washed in that ever kiddie-pleasing Baldur's Gate mentality of trying to come across as the band who got there first, only it fails. Partly due to the dire vocal performance; partly due to them just being idiots. And don't be fooled into thinking this might be a professionally executed demo, no sir; the production on this thing is so bad it is akin to spending your summer holidays at a local B&B.

Traditionally I would compile a list of adjustments the band needs to undertake to better their future efforts, but as this is so incredibly paltry all I can do is hope they get booked for next year's Bloodstock so we can have words. If not, I could always book a flight to Burbank and introduce them to a sledgehammer and a batch of Doomsword albums.